Consultation for parents. Emotional well-being of the child in the family
Rules of emotional education or some tips for parents
In the modern world, where parents are too busy with work and children spend too much time at the computer, emotional education and the development of the emotional sphere in children are of particular importance.
The emotional sphere is one of the most important components of the human personality.
Fear and delight, sadness and joy, melancholy and inspiration form the basis of our life. Negative emotions make a person suffer. Trying to get rid of them, parents instill in their children incorrect response patterns. But it is negative emotions that warn us of danger, force us to be attentive, and promote self-improvement. To succeed in life, to become an adequate person, you need to learn to correctly understand emotional signals and act consciously. Positive emotions, on the contrary, inspire you. Some adults strive too much for pleasure and make it the meaning of their lives. Such rules of upbringing turn offspring into demanding and capricious tyrants. Most people perceive fun as something rare, possible only “on holidays” and on a special occasion. They grow up children who, having matured, do not know how to rejoice just like that. People are not born optimists or pessimists. If parents tend to see, first of all, the good in any event, then their children will inherit an optimistic worldview. Parents who often punish their children and strictly monitor their mistakes provoke the formation of pessimism and uncertainty. Emotional education is teaching a child to a certain type of response. The ability to cope with emotions, control over difficult experiences and empathy are what all parents should teach their children. Without this, a happy and psychologically healthy life is impossible. Talking about feelings
The first thing you should teach your child is to label emotions with words.
Even the youngest children need this. When you tell your baby, “I know you're sad,” you're letting him know that he's understood and that he now knows what to call what he's feeling. According to research, labeling an emotion has a calming effect on the nervous system and helps children recover faster from unpleasant incidents. The moment we talk about an emotion, the left lobe of the brain, where the centers of language and logic are located, is activated, which helps us concentrate and calm down. Recommendation for parents: teach children to describe their feelings, help them choose the right words.
To do this, you need to expand your child’s vocabulary. Remember: an expressed emotion is much easier to experience. There are no bad emotions
One of the main mistakes of parents is the desire to hide, silence or ignore the negative emotions of children.
Many parents believe that emotions will go away on their own, but that is a misconception that makes children think that being angry is bad and unacceptable. Anyone who is angry is disgusting. The result: children begin to fear “bad” feelings. Don't forget : negative experiences pass faster if you pay attention to them.
Discuss them with your children, try to understand and understand them. Don't scold children for their feelings
Very often, parents try to suppress their children's emotions with phrases like "Stop crying" or "You shouldn't feel like that." This is a huge mistake. When we tell a child how he should feel, we cause him to mistrust his feelings, which leads to self-doubt and loss of self-esteem. On the other hand, when we tell a child that he feels correctly, but he needs other ways of expression, we preserve his character and maintain his self-esteem. In addition, he knows that there is an understanding adult next to him who is going to help him.
No punishments
The simplest and at the same time the most incorrect way to influence a child is through threats and punishment. It only works in the short term, immediately making children behave well. But in the future it leads to even greater behavioral problems. Children who are constantly punished do not know how to solve problems and control themselves. Punishment makes them feel helpless and constantly resentful towards their parents. Often such children begin to think more about revenge than about wanting to do better next time. In addition, any methods of punishment teach that aggression and threats are a great way to get your way. Children who are spanked begin to act more hostile and aggressive with their peers.
Crisis is an opportunity
Any conflicts, difficulties and negative experiences of your child are not only a problem, but also a good opportunity to become closer to him and teach him empathy. When you work through a problem with your child, you are teaching him a lesson about managing his feelings. We no longer have to view our children's anger as a challenge to our authority, their children's fears as evidence of our incompetence as parents, and their sadness as "another damn problem I have to deal with today." When a child feels sad, angry or afraid, he needs his parents most. By acknowledging our children's emotions, we teach them the art of self-soothing that they will use throughout their lives.
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