Etiquette is the generally accepted norms of behavior of people in society. Children, just like adults, need to know how to behave. And mothers and fathers, grandparents, aunts and uncles, all close and dear people should help them in mastering etiquette.
The importance of children's etiquette
Why burden a small child with such issues as etiquette and deprive him of a carefree childhood? Who needs it? Let's answer these questions and talk about the importance of children's etiquette. But they really need him! First of all, to themselves, and not to their environment, as many people think. It is in childhood that the foundations of human behavior, character traits, and habits are laid. The kind of upbringing a child received in childhood determines his future success, education, career, and life in general. In addition, etiquette opens the door to society for the child. A culture of behavior and communication helps a child to be understood and heard. It is pleasant to deal with, talk to, and communicate with a well-mannered person, regardless of his age and status. A child who knows and follows the rules of etiquette develops the correct attitude and understanding of conscience, morality, morality, and responsibility.
Types of etiquette
Conventionally, etiquette for every day can be divided into two large groups. The first is generally accepted rules for all situations. The second is the rules of behavior in certain areas, for example, mourning, military, religious etiquette, and so on. There are also rules of dance etiquette, behavior in case of fire, and so on. Parents must clearly understand that teaching their child the rules of behavior should begin from an early age.
This process should occur gradually and in the form of a game. To begin with, the child is explained how to behave at the table, how to address an adult, and how to behave in a store. Later, you can learn other types of etiquette, for example, rules of conduct in a hospital, kindergarten, school, and so on.
Rules of conduct for preschoolers in pictures
You can teach your child etiquette both by example and by visual aids. You can explain how to behave in society and show illustrations. The book “Etiquette for Kids” in pictures by E. V. Sokolova and N. N. Yankovskaya is suitable for this.
When showing your child a picture, you can ask leading questions: “What do you think is shown here? How should you behave?" Let the child try to formulate the rules of behavior himself.
At what age should a child be taught rules of conduct?
Psychologists believe that introducing good manners to a child should begin from the first years of life, despite the fact that the conscious age begins at approximately 5 years. From the age of 2-3 years, it is important to tell a child how to behave at the table. At this stage of development, many toddlers are already eating on their own, which means that it’s time to learn the rules of good manners at the table.
Preschool children receive the necessary knowledge primarily from their parents. Later, etiquette is studied in kindergarten. This is how primary socialization takes place. By this age, the child should already clearly understand that there are situations in life in which he should show respect and politeness to his peers and older people.
Let's play and learn
Often when visiting, finding themselves in a close circle, the quietest kids begin to make a fuss. To prevent this, conduct a “rehearsal” in advance of how you will go on a visit. The home dining table is the best training ground for practicing the rules of behavior. You can tell your child fairy tales about wizards at dinner, or you can tell stories about how to behave and, thanks to this, wonderfully succeed in society. Lunch will pass unnoticed and usefully. You also don’t have to exhaust yourself and your child with a detailed study of the rules of etiquette for children.
First, help your child understand the main positions:
• Etiquette is a set of rules adopted so that people can communicate freely and confidently with each other without disturbing others with their actions. Understanding this, the child will easily understand why, when visiting, one should not poke one’s little nose into other people’s things without asking, interfere in the conversation of adults, throw pieces, make noise, and so on;
• modesty, calm behavior and tolerance are the true adornment of a guest, even if he does not know all the subtleties of etiquette. Therefore, it is best to wait until they offer you some dish or serve dessert, rather than noisily demand it. A large company, especially at a common table, is for a child the first test of his childish selfishness. The desire to attract special attention to one’s person should recede, and in order to reinforce his good behavior, it is a good idea to reward the child with a prize. Which one? Try to awaken your imagination. No one knows your baby's preferences better than you;
• for a child, the world around him is a field for play and exploration. Therefore, he is interested in finding new ways to eat and use spoons and forks. He perceives etiquette as something that interferes with his curiosity and creativity. And only one explanation will reconcile him with the strict rules - they were invented so that everyone could live in peace with each other;
• ask him: “Would you like it if a little brawler sat next to you, screaming and causing mischief?” I think not, so act like someone someone else would enjoy being around.”
What should parents understand?
Children first learn rules of behavior from their parents. It is mom and dad who show their son or daughter an example of how to behave in a given situation. Parents must remember that the child follows their example in everything, so the behavior of adults must be thoughtful and balanced.
Mom and dad must remember that it is impossible to force their child to learn certain rules. This can only cause a protest from a son or daughter. Learning is best done while playing. For example, you can learn table etiquette by playing with dolls.
If parents behave competently, the child will certainly copy their manners. Good manners will also manifest themselves in society, which will help avoid awkward situations.
WHEN TO INVOLVE THE RULES OF GOOD TONE?
You can teach children rules of behavior from a young age, although awareness will come much later - after 5 years. Children should be introduced to table manners from the age of 2. The child is already quite capable of eating on his own, which means it’s time to start explaining how he can and cannot behave while eating.
Preschoolers are taught etiquette by their parents at home and by teachers in kindergarten. The baby is in the company of adults and children; situations arise around him every day that require politeness, respect for elders, and the ability to interact with peers.
When a child grows up and goes to school, his level of freedom will increase, and there will be less control from adults. All omissions of parents in upbringing will be clearly visible, and correcting the behavior of schoolchildren is not easy. That is why the rules of etiquette and ethics (the foundations of ethics and ethics) must be laid down from an early age.
Rules of speech etiquette
Good manners in children and adults are the key to their recognition in society. Let's list the main points regarding speech etiquette:
- In the morning you should say: “Good morning,” and before going to bed, say “Good night.”
- You need to say hello to your neighbors even when you don’t know them personally.
- When meeting with family and friends, you need to say hello, and say goodbye: “Goodbye.”
- It is important to know the words “Thank you”, “Please”, “be kind” and apply them in the appropriate situation.
- Address adult strangers and teachers as “you.”
- If some kind of trouble happened, for example, the child accidentally hit someone or broke something, you should apologize.
- If during a conversation a child wants to address an adult, you need to use the following words: “Can I ask” or “Sorry, but can I interrupt you.”
These simple rules help to show respect for other people, which is extremely important in society.
WHAT IS ETIQUETTE?
Etiquette is a set of norms and rules governing the behavior of people in society or a particular social group. When we talk about etiquette for children, we mean the rules of good behavior, first of all, in relation to adults, because they are the ones who can evaluate behavior as “good” or “bad” due to their experience.
Etiquette is divided into different types - there are both generally accepted rules and special etiquette for individual occasions (for example, official, religious, mourning). Children should be taught etiquette gradually, and for preschool age, those rules of good manners that children can apply in everyday situations are sufficient.
Table manners
Table etiquette should be taught to your child from an early age, as soon as the baby learns to eat on his own. In addition to teaching their son or daughter, parents should also observe good manners themselves.
Personal example is the most effective way to instill correct behavior in the younger generation. Let's name the main rules:
- Eating should only be done in areas designated for this purpose, such as the kitchen or living room.
- You cannot take food with your hands, which is usually eaten with a fork or spoon.
- It is important to use only your own cutlery.
- You need to eat food only from your own plate, you don’t need to take food from someone else’s plate.
- Do not throw food on the floor or smear it on the plate with your fingers.
- It is not nice to attack food; it is important to consider that the dish should be tried by all family members.
- Don't talk with your mouth full. It's not pretty, and you can choke.
- It’s not nice to drink juice through a straw too loudly, and the same goes for soup.
- You need to chew with your mouth closed and slowly.
- It is unacceptable to pick your mouth at the table.
- If necessary, use a towel or napkin. Under no circumstances should you wipe your face with your sleeve.
- Don't take a piece from a shared plate, take a bite, and then put it back.
After eating, you should clear your plate and thank the cook if it is a home-cooked meal. In a cafe, dishes are left on the table.
Note to parents
It is difficult to name the exact age when you need to start teaching your child good manners. It is necessary to instill in a child norms of behavior with family members and society from birth, even when the child does not understand the whole essence. He understands the intonations, the mood of his family and sees the picture of what is happening.
The table below clearly illustrates the approximate age range when you can introduce your child to the rules of behavior.
Table “When and how to teach a child etiquette”
Age | What to pay attention to |
Up to 1 year | We use polite words in our speech (“thank you”, “please”, “good morning”, “good night”) |
We wash our hands before eating, saying out loud why we need to do this | |
1-3 years | We instill neatness - use a bib or napkin, change soiled clothes after eating, wash your face and hands |
We instill norms of behavior and communication in the family, showing by example respect and politeness | |
We teach to eat with a spoon and fork, we replace the sippy cup with a mug | |
3-5 years | We improve the skill of using cutlery, teach how to eat carefully - do not move away from the table, lean towards the plate so as not to spill the soup, and not to spread “dirt” around you |
We actively teach independent personal hygiene - brushing teeth, washing hands, using a handkerchief or napkin. | |
We teach you to cover your mouth when coughing or sneezing; don’t forget about polite wishes addressed to another person (“Be healthy”) | |
We introduce the child to the rules of behavior in public places, transport, at a party, at cultural events, in kindergarten | |
5-6 years | We continue to introduce the child to table etiquette, adding the use of a knife to everyday life |
We improve our knowledge of guest etiquette, apply the rules if we go on a visit; we correct mistakes, explain to the child why some actions are unacceptable | |
By our example we constantly show how to communicate in the family and in society outside it, we monitor our behavior | |
School age | Let’s not forget everything we instilled in the child before; we remind you how to behave at the table (in the school canteen), in lessons (speech etiquette, respect for the teacher, peers), in transport (independent trips) and public places |
How to behave properly when visiting?
If parents and their baby go to visit, it is important to explain to the baby that in someone else’s house you should behave calmly and politely, and you cannot take toys and other things without permission.
Guest etiquette rules:
- It’s not nice to come to visit empty-handed. It is better to take some symbolic treat with you, for example, a box of chocolates.
- There is no need to ask for treats or tea without the invitation of the owners of the house. It is also rude to sit down at the table without an invitation, even if it is already set.
- When meeting the owners of the house, you should definitely say hello, and say goodbye: “Goodbye” or “See you soon.”
- It is rude to walk from room to room without an invitation.
- Under no circumstances should you demand anything from the owners.
- Don't throw candy wrappers and other trash.
- When leaving, you should definitely thank the owners of the house for the warm welcome and wish you all the best.
Many children get so played out that if they have to say goodbye, they throw a tantrum. It is important to explain to the baby that he will be able to finish the game next time, but now it’s time to leave.
Behavior rules
Greeting rules
Greeting rules are a very important step in learning the rules of etiquette. After all, the first thing we do when meeting a familiar person is to greet him. Communication etiquette should be taught from an early age so that later an adult does not have difficulties in communication.
• It is very important to know that a well-mannered person never expects to be greeted. Don’t let yourself get ahead of yourself - do it yourself, especially if you meet an acquaintance older than you.
• It is indecent to wave your arms and shout “at the top of your lungs” if the people you would like to greet are far from you. It will be enough to simply nod to them when you meet their gaze.
• Loud, surprised cries of “bah, who am I seeing”, “well, finally”, “where have you been” cannot be called a greeting.
• Don’t be afraid to say hello to a person once again if you meet him more than once during the day. Greet him with a smile, or a nod of your head, or a slight wave of your hand.
• Any communication begins with a greeting. According to etiquette, you need to greet a person with the words: “Hello!”, “Good morning!”, “Good afternoon!”, “Good evening!”. These are the most common and acceptable forms of greeting. Among close people, it is most often customary to say “hello.”
• In a greeting, intonation is very important, warm and friendly, because even ordinary greeting words expressed in a rude or dry tone can offend the person you are greeting. And if you smile when you say greeting, this will immediately endear you to the person. Only the smile must be sincere.
• Greetings are usually accompanied by a bow, a nod, a handshake, and a hug. When greeting, you should not lower your eyes. You need to meet the gaze of the person you are greeting, otherwise the person will think that it is unpleasant for you to communicate with him, that you are hiding something, etc. When greeting, it is indecent to keep your hands in your pockets. This expresses disrespect for the interlocutor.
There are different situations for exchanging greetings. There are some things to keep in mind if you want to be a polite person and not hurt the feelings of others.
• If you notice a friend in the distance (on the other side of the street, on a bus, etc.), and if you are also noticed, you need to greet the person with a nod of your head, a wave of your hand, a bow, a smile. You should not shout at the top of your voice - you will put both him and yourself in an awkward situation.
• If you see a friend approaching you, you don’t need to shout “Hello” from afar. Wait until the distance between you is reduced to a few steps, and then greet him.
• If you are walking with someone and your companion says hello to someone you don't know, you should say hello too.
• If you meet someone you know in the company of a stranger, you should greet them both. You should also greet everyone in the group you approach.
If you are walking in a group and meet someone you know, it is not necessary to introduce him to the others. You can apologize, step aside for a few seconds and talk with a friend. But don’t delay the conversation, because other people are waiting for you.
• You should definitely greet those people you meet often, even if you don't know them. For example, with the seller of the nearest store, with the postman, with neighbors from the entrance. This is basic politeness.
• If you enter a room where there are many people, you should not greet everyone individually, but say a general “hello.”
When greeting people, they often shake hands. Here etiquette also pays attention to some subtleties.
• The elders shake hands first with the younger ones, and not vice versa.
• Among peers, women are the first to shake hands with men.
• If two married couples meet, the women greet each other first, then the men greet the women, then the men greet each other.
• Before shaking hands, a man must take off his glove. A woman does not have to do this. However, when greeting noticeably older people, everyone should take off the glove.
The way we begin communication with a person largely determines the future fate of this communication, so it’s worth following simple rules of etiquette, it definitely won’t hurt!
• The younger ones greet the elders first, men greet women.
• A woman greets a man first if he is much older than her. Exceptions to this rule: the one who enters the room, be it a man or a woman, is the first to greet those present, the one leaving is the first to say goodbye to those remaining.
Family behavior
From an early age, it is important to tell your son or daughter that it is worth behaving correctly not only in front of strangers, but also within the family circle. It is important to adhere to the following manners:
- Address older people politely and using “you”.
- You cannot speak rudely and impudently.
- It is not nice to yell at siblings or other family members.
- There is no need to sneak and deceive.
- If you need to enter the room of your parents, older brother or sister, you should definitely knock and ask permission to enter.
- It is necessary to treat family members with respect. If someone is resting, do not make noise.
- Do not interfere with parents' work or household chores.
- In the morning you need to wish good morning, and at night you need to wish good night.
A respectful attitude will prevent conflicts and form trusting relationships between family members.
If a quarrel occurs, it is important to try to make amends for the conflict and ask for forgiveness if it was your fault.
Be an example
Adults, unfortunately, often live by a double standard. At home, in front of a child, many of us allow ourselves to do whatever we want, but when we go out “in public,” we are literally transformed.
And it is difficult for the baby to understand why the mother, who had just been sitting on the windowsill, swinging her legs, simultaneously noisily sipping tea and chatting loudly on the phone with her neighbor, suddenly changed her behavior and now froze at someone else’s table with a frozen look, demanding the same from him . Children are not characterized by hypocrisy and rapid transition from one behavior model to another. The greater the difference in the behavior of loved ones, the more difficult it is to raise a baby within the framework of generally accepted rules.
An English proverb says: “The best sermon is a good example.” And do not forget that the example must be constant. Otherwise, having forgotten yourself for a minute, you will shock those around you with a sharp change in behavior. If you want your child to always and under any circumstances behave in such a way that he is held up as an example of a well-mannered person, then behave constantly in accordance with the rules. Both at a party and at home. The sooner you start social behavior lessons, the better. Mothers take their children to various educational courses, forgetting that the most intricate knowledge and skills will not help if the child behaves like a “bear in a china shop.”
Teaching etiquette from childhood is perhaps more important than learning a foreign language or anything else. A person can master a foreign language at any age, but an ignorant adult is incorrigible. He has formed habits and patterns of behavior on a subconscious level, which means that, even recognizing the need to behave more modestly, he will automatically act ugly.
But how can we ensure that remarks and prohibitions do not stifle character and the creativity that exists in every child? Constantly lecturing him, he will feel constrained at a party, fearing that he will not act comme il faut (as he should), to put it in French. It is possible to structure upbringing in such a way that the child’s imagination will develop and the rules of behavior will be remembered.
• Children love to do things the other way around. The only saving grace is that they love to play even more. Play the game "Princess and the Pea" several times - let your baby turn into a royal offspring and, as such, goes for a walk, says hello and eats at the table. Mom’s job is to say “Your Highness” and act as if you yourself are a queen or at least a lady of the court. At first the child will pretend and overact, but then he will get into the role.
• You can play etiquette using toys. Let the dolls visit each other, walk down the street and there... Then your imagination will tell you. By coming up with improvised scenes, you can show how funny it can be to look at an ill-mannered ignoramus and how nice someone who behaves correctly looks. You can come up with two permanent heroes with pronounced negative and positive characters. Don’t forget to praise the “good” doll and give another a chance: “Well, her friend will soon improve.”
• Many children's poets and writers have works on this topic that clearly explain the rules of behavior in pictures. It is remembered better in poetry. When choosing books for the night, give preference to these poems and stories. More than one generation has grown up reading Mark Twain’s novel “The Prince and the Pauper” or the poem “A bear of five or six years old was taught how to behave...”. Memorize the most useful lines. This way you will be supported by more authority.
• Draw your child's attention to well-mannered people. You can do this while walking, visiting, or even while watching TV. Watch historical films from the point of view of etiquette in different eras and among different peoples. Explain to your son or daughter why people behave the way they do. You should not repeat a phrase that does not explain anything to the child: “That’s how it is!” if he asks why people bow funny. Say that you have previously expressed respect and trust in your interlocutor in this way.
• There are two ways to educate a person - to scold for incorrect behavior and to praise for exemplary behavior. Rich human experience suggests that the second method is still more effective.
Street etiquette rules
It is important to teach your child to behave correctly not only at home, but also on the street. If a child does not know good manners, he will most likely receive condemnation from society. Let's consider the main principles of behavior:
- Garbage should only be thrown into a trash bin or trash can.
- You cannot pick flowers from flower beds, walk on lawns, climb into fountains or other places not intended for these purposes.
- It is not nice to point a finger at a person and talk about him out loud.
- The road should only be crossed at a pedestrian crossing.
- You must keep a line in the store.
- You should not pester strangers with questions or force your stories on them.
- It is forbidden to run far from your parents or hide during a walk.
- If you need to stop while walking along the sidewalk, for example to tie your shoelaces, you should step aside.
In addition, it is important to teach your child not to offend other boys and girls on playgrounds and in the park.
You cannot take away toys, say hurtful words, push on slides and fight.
WHAT SHOULD A PRESCHOOLER KNOW?
The best example for a child is family members, primarily parents. By imitating them, the baby learns good and bad, so parents must control their behavior in front of the child. You should not forcefully teach your child politeness if, due to his age, he still cannot understand why he needs to say hello to strangers. Or with those about whom his parents do not speak very well. In addition, imposing rules can lead to a backlash – protest.
Around age 5, just when adult imitation is in full swing, is the time to start paying your child's attention to how you interact with other people, especially outside the family. Here are the rules that a preschooler needs to know so as not to get into an awkward situation and not make their parents blush.
SPEECH ETIQUETTE
It is necessary to follow the rules of speech etiquette not only with members of your family, but in general with all children and adults, not necessarily only with acquaintances. Adults should set an example for children and also follow the rules of communication:
- greet your family in the morning, wish them good night before going to bed;
- greet acquaintances on the street and at a party, and then say goodbye to them;
- say hello to your neighbors, even if you don’t know each other personally;
- use the words “thank you”, “please”, “be kind”, “sorry”;
- address strangers using “you”;
- do not insult, do not tease other children, do not snitch, do not provoke;
- apologize if you did something wrong;
- say “let me interrupt you” if you need to address one of the speakers.
DINING ETIQUETTE
A child should be taught table manners from an early age, and as they grow older, the requirements for the child will increase. The way a child behaves at the table creates the main idea of his upbringing, cleanliness and respect for such a family ritual as eating.
During meals, you must observe table etiquette:
- you need to eat only in a designated place (kitchen or dining room);
- use cutlery during family meals, this also applies to small children (prevent smearing food with your fingers on the plate);
- you need to eat from your own plate, do not comment on the contents of someone else’s;
- do not pounce on food if not all family members have gathered;
- do not chat with your mouth full, remember the rule “when I eat, I am deaf and dumb”;
- chew with your mouth closed;
- do not play with food, do not indulge in drinks (do not spill tea, water, do not drink juice loudly through a straw);
- it is indecent to express your negative opinion about food (“ugh, that’s disgusting”, “I won’t eat this”);
- it is indecent to put your elbows on the table, to push;
- It’s not nice to stretch across the entire table; you need to ask the person sitting next to you to pass something;
- You can’t pick your mouth at the table;
- you need to use a napkin or towel, and be able to ask for a clean napkin;
- take from the plate that piece of bread (piece of pie, sandwich, fruit) that is closest, and not choose the one that is larger or more beautiful;
- Moreover, it is indecent to take a piece from a common plate, hold it and put it back;
- before leaving the table, you need to wait until all family members have finished the meal, or ask adults for permission to leave;
- You can’t take a plate of food and go to the TV or to another room.
GUEST ETIQUETTE
When visiting, you need to behave calmly, show respect to the owners of the house and follow the rules:
- do not come empty-handed (bring some kind of treat, even symbolic);
- do not ask for tea without an invitation;
- always say hello to the owners of the house;
- you cannot walk around rooms without permission and touch other people’s things on shelves or inside cabinets;
- It is strictly forbidden to jump on beds, sofas, chairs, even if the owner’s child does this;
- do not throw tantrums, do not demand anything from the owners of the apartment;
- keep clean, throw away trash after yourself (candy wrappers, juice boxes), collect toys after yourself;
- calmly pack up and leave when the time comes, do not demand to play more;
- Be sure to say “thank you” for the hospitality and food, and say goodbye to the owners of the house.
FAMILY ETIQUETTE
The rules of behavior in each family are established individually, but there are common ones for all - respect and mutual understanding.
When communicating with family members, you must adhere to the following rules:
- older relatives must be treated with respect, without being rude, not insolent, or undermining the authority of the head of the family;
- You cannot swear or shout at family members;
- if you need to get into the room of your parents (or other relatives), you should definitely knock;
- it is at least ugly to tell or “report” on a brother or sister;
- It is important to respect the work of family members, be it cooking, cleaning the house or playing together.
RULES OF CONDUCT ON THE STREET
If at home only family members can judge a child’s upbringing, then on the street all the flaws in upbringing are striking. So that you don’t have to blush awkwardly and embarrassly take your baby away, teach him the following rules:
- there is a trash can for garbage;
- It is forbidden to walk on lawns or pick flowers from flower beds;
- it is indecent to point a finger at people and discuss their appearance out loud;
- you cannot cross the road whenever and wherever you want if cars are driving along it;
- You should not intrusively tell any personal information to strangers;
- it is forbidden to leave the place where the parent left the child waiting for him, or where they agreed to meet;
- When walking, you should not run far ahead of your parents or hide in busy places;
- when moving along the sidewalk, you need to walk on the right side (analogy with lanes for cars);
- Don’t stop in the middle of the sidewalk to tie a shoelace or chat with a friend—you need to step aside.
BEHAVIOR IN TRANSPORT
Sooner or later, you and your child will have to go somewhere by public transport, so instruct your little passenger in advance on how to behave on a bus, train, train, or plane:
- on the bus, give up your seat to older people (if the child is still small, then explain that now he needs to sit for his own safety, and another person will give up his seat to the grandmother);
- offer a place to pregnant women (when the child already knows this concept);
- on a long-distance train you cannot run around the carriage or knock on other people’s compartments;
- do not shout, do not knock on the wall of the train compartment;
- on an airplane you cannot stand up from your seat if this is temporarily prohibited, shout loudly, or push the seat in front with your feet;
- in any type of transport, it is indecent to dirty the person sitting in front with your feet or push the back of the chair with dirty shoes;
- It is forbidden to shout, laugh loudly, or sing songs.
RULES OF CONDUCT AT THE THEATER, CIRCUS OR OTHER CULTURAL EVENT
Parents have the opportunity to introduce children to cultural life from an early age - theaters, museums and other institutions are now available almost from birth. Therefore, before visiting such places, you need to explain to your child how to behave:
- do not be late for the performance, but arrive with plenty of time to return your outerwear and visit the restroom, if necessary;
- come to the hall before the program starts in order to take your seat and not disturb your neighbors;
- if you are still late, you need to move forward to your seat along the row facing forward, and apologize for the inconvenience caused;
- do not crunch on food or make noise with your drink during a performance or movie show;
- do not talk during the session, do not answer phone calls, put the device on silent mode.
GENERAL RULES OF CONDUCT
There are things that are unacceptable in any place, in any team:
- scratching, picking teeth, ears, nose in public;
- get ahead of others when passing through a door, for example, in a store;
- scream, run, slam doors;
- be rude, answer questions unkindly;
- cough without covering your mouth and burp without apologizing;
- shouting on public transport;
- run and step on feet;
- shuffle your feet when walking;
- chew gum without covering your mouth, chew loudly in public.
Principles of behavior in public transport
There are also certain standards of behavior in public transport. All children and parents have to travel on a tram or bus at some point. What you need to know:
- It is necessary to give way to an elderly person or people with disabilities.
- Pregnant women should also give up their seat.
- You should not have a telephone conversation that is too loud. If you need to talk on the phone, this should be done in halftone.
- As for communicating with each other, the conversation should be conducted quietly, without shouting.
- When traveling by train, there is no need to run around the carriage, talk loudly and pester passengers with questions.
- You are not allowed to leave your seat on the plane. If you need to go to the toilet, this should only be done accompanied by your parents.
- Under no circumstances should you dirty other passengers if your shoes are dirty.
- Laughing loudly and singing songs is prohibited.
No matter what kind of transport the child is in, it is forbidden to move far from the parents.
Conclusion
You see that, in general, table manners are not so complicated and do not require so much effort from children. All restrictions are based only on respect for other people's space and comfort.
The importance of table etiquette for children is comparable to the importance of other rules of politeness. Such rules make them worthy people, pleasant interlocutors and develop self-esteem.
In conclusion, I want to share an interesting educational video about table etiquette for children:
And that's all for me. I hope my tips were helpful to you! Read, reflect, put them into practice, show them to your friends and share on social networks. And be sure to come back again. See you again!
Telephone etiquette
Mom and dad must teach their son or daughter to talk on the phone correctly.
Here are the rules:
- It is better not to make friendly calls before 8:00 am and after 21:00 pm. You should also not make several calls in a row if no one picks up the phone. Perhaps the person is busy.
- Any conversation should begin with greeting words: “Hello”, “Good morning”, “Good evening” and so on.
- If during the previous conversation you promised to call back, do not forget to do so.
- If the person you need answers the phone, greet him, introduce yourself, and only then ask someone you know to answer the phone.
- If the number was dialed incorrectly, it is important to apologize and only then hang up.
- You cannot use your phone for pampering.
After the conversation ends, you should say goodbye. The person making the call hangs up first.
If you get a call at an inopportune time, apologize and ask to call back a little later.
How to teach your child etiquette
There is no better way to teach etiquette than by the example of mom and dad. Kids copy their loved ones and imitate them. Parents must take strict control of their own behavior: do not shout, do not show rudeness or ignorance. In case of bad behavior of a child, while remaining calm, adults will have to be firm in their words and decisions. There is no doubt that in the future children will show themselves just as calmly in a similar situation.
Repeating polite words whenever appropriate is also learning. It is enough to remind your child that he needs to say hello to his neighbor, say “thank you” after eating, “good night” before going to bed. Over time, this will become a habit, and the child will say such words automatically.
The biggest mistake parents make is “imposing” etiquette. Adults often make rude remarks and constantly reprimand them for various reasons or without them. The baby feels pressure, a confrontation begins. Parents get irritated, angry, insist on their own and end up with a complete denial of any rules by their child.
Training should be carried out unobtrusively, preferably in a playful way. Then the little person will not even feel that the learning process is taking place, he will willingly and happily complete game tasks, mastering the material will go faster and will bring more benefits.
Role-playing with dolls will be very good and effective. Adults need to help the child come up with a game situation: the dolls came to visit the little bear, one behaves well, the other behaves badly; the little bunny plays around when he eats; dolls are going to a ball and much more.
Playing theater will also be effective; you can give your child the opportunity to be both a positive hero and a negative one. It will be beneficial to watch cartoons with your child, which focus on a polite attitude towards others, instilling rules of good manners in which characters are discussed and the peculiarities of their behavior. Don’t forget about reading books: fairy tales, poems, nursery rhymes.
Rules of etiquette at cultural events
Children 6-7 years old often go with their parents to cinemas, the circus, various concerts or exhibitions. It is important to know how to behave in such a situation.
Let's name the main rules:
- You must not be late for the start of the show.
- Before entering the hall, you need to take off your outerwear if it is a cold season.
- You must enter the hall before the start of the event so that after it starts you do not disturb other people by taking your place.
- If for some reason you were delayed or went to the restroom, you need to return to your seat facing the people sitting.
- Avoid talking during the session or eating popcorn or other food too loudly.
After finishing the program, you should not run to the exit, pushing other people. You should calmly go out with other visitors.
When to start teaching your child etiquette
Most likely, every parent himself will feel the moment when his child is ready to understand and accept etiquette training. But already in infancy, children unconsciously absorb emotions received from their parents. Affectionate words, a gentle attitude, a kind voice, smiles - all this helps the baby to grasp a positive attitude in life. Therefore, the sooner relatives begin to introduce a friendly attitude to the child, the easier the process of learning etiquette will be in the future.
Already from the age of one, the child begins to lead an active life: he tries to talk, plays with peers, and begins to walk. Therefore, it can be argued that this is exactly the time to begin the formation of conscious behavior. It's time to teach your baby to understand how to behave by the intonation of his parents' voice. Having become a little older, at the age of two, the child must have minimal table manners and use polite words or gestures when communicating with others.
Conscious, in-depth teaching of etiquette can only be imparted to young children after reaching the age of five. Kindergarten teachers come to help parents. It is extremely important when a child’s good behavior is set as an example to his peers and praised. The desire to behave positively grows, more friends appear, communication brings pleasure.
When a child becomes a schoolchild, the requirements for his behavior in society will increase, life will become more eventful and varied. Parents should use this moment to reinforce instilled good manners. It is necessary to convey to the child that now he is doubly responsible for his behavior, that the attitude of the people around him, his success in school and life in general depends on this.
The task of parents is also to enrich the student culturally. You should try to visit exhibitions, theaters, museums, and cultural events with your child more often.
You should not ignore comments from school teachers about your child’s behavior. And most importantly, at any stage of teaching etiquette to their child, parents themselves should not forget about maintaining good manners and remain a role model in any situation.
Rules of behavior during a school lesson
Children of early school age, as well as children 10-12 years old and older, should know the norms of behavior in a school lesson.
Let's call them:
- You need to sit quietly.
- It is important to listen carefully to the teacher.
- When the teacher enters the classroom, the children stand up.
- If you need to go to the toilet, you need to raise your hand and ask permission.
- You can't talk to classmates.
- If you are asked, it is important to stand up and go to the board.
Each class's rules of conduct may be slightly different. The teacher tells the children about the norms of behavior and monitors their implementation.
Basic standards of safe behavior in the summer on water and in nature
When relaxing at sea or in the forest, there are separate etiquette standards for children and older children. Let's look at them in more detail:
- It is forbidden to go far from the resting place.
- It is forbidden to climb into a fire if an adult has lit a fire.
- When eating, it is important to follow the same rules that are used at the table.
- You cannot throw garbage or break tree branches.
- It is forbidden to enter the water without parents and to swim far from the shore.
- It is important to maintain good hygiene and not put your hands in your mouth.
In the pictures below you can see illustrated rules of behavior on the water.
In the following illustration you can familiarize yourself with the basic rules of behavior in the forest. They apply to children and adults.
Children's pranks
When a child reaches into a common dish, scatters pieces, knocks with a spoon and demands something, some mothers think that everyone should be touched by cute pranks. All this is “attributed” to childish spontaneity. However, the child grows up, and it turns out that time is lost. If you failed to instill rules of behavior in your child from the age of three (later from five) and you only begin to tell him about “what is required” before going to school, then you risk being hopelessly late. Perhaps in those situations that your child considers important, he will still be able to restrain himself, but if he forgets for a minute, he will immediately commit a tactlessness.
How to behave if your child is alone at home
Situations often arise that parents are forced to leave their son or daughter at home for a while. At the same time, it is extremely important to explain to the child how to behave in this case. The main rules include:
- You cannot open windows or a balcony if it is a multi-story building.
- It is prohibited to open the gas or use matches or lighters.
- Do not open the water and play with it.
- It is better to spend time quietly, reading books or watching cartoons.
- It is forbidden to invite guests without permission.
- In any emergency, you should call your parents.
- It is forbidden to go outside without leaving the apartment.
- If there is a fire, you need to call “01”, if strangers are breaking into the apartment, you need to call “02”.
Under no circumstances should you open doors to strangers. If a stranger asks if you are alone at home, say: “Dad is sleeping, you can come later.”
LEARNING BY PLAYING
You can also teach your child the rules of good manners through play. Conduct politeness lessons at home when you are studying with him or just playing in the nursery. You can play out situations with the help of dolls and your favorite toys - write a fairy tale about someone ill-mannered, act out a mini-scene, come up with etiquette games (“tea party with dolls”, “the bear went to visit”, etc.), and then - discuss and ask: “Who did the right thing? And why? Who will mom praise?" You can put on a whole theatrical performance for kids.
Read books on this topic and discuss which characters behave correctly and which ones are rude to others. There are many books on the topic of children's etiquette, here are some of them:
- “Etiquette for children of different ages”, A. Usachev;
- “Rules of Conduct”, E. Beaumont;
- “Polite words”, O. Korneeva;
- “Sociable Tales”, T. Shorygina;
- “The ABC of Politeness”, L. Vasilyeva-Gangnus;
- “School of politeness for small owners”, N. Ivanova, G. Shalaeva;
- “Rules of conduct for well-mannered children”, G. Shalaeva, O. Zhuravleva, O. Sazonova;
- “The most important rules of behavior for well-mannered children”, Harvest publishing house;
- “Etiquette for Fidgets”, Clever publishing house;
- “How to behave at the table. Etiquette for everyone in stories, poems, pictures,” ed. R. Dankova.
In preschool educational institutions, children are taught politeness according to specially developed programs. Teachers organize classes and teach children the rules of good manners, but this does not mean that parents should abandon this topic and rely only on teachers.
General rules of child behavior
We invite you to consider presentations on the topic of children's behavior in various places in verse. You can show them to your child too.
On the street
At the table
On road
Away
How do methods change as the child grows?
With age, as a child gets older and smarter, his ability to learn increases. By about the age of five, he has already developed a certain model of behavior. A child of this age already knows the basic rules very well, but over time others are added to them.
Firstly, you should not accustom your child to the fact that eating involves watching cartoons on TV. This has an adverse effect on digestion and distracts you from the process of eating.
Secondly, teach him that he can eat not just anywhere in the house, but in a specially designated place - in the kitchen.
In addition, you need to behave decently while eating so as not to spoil the appetite of other family members. You cannot slurp, chat, shout, reach into the plate with your hands (if the dish is supposed to be eaten with cutlery), pull your fork towards a common dish, play with food, grab the last piece, etc.
At the age of five, a child is receptive to other types of learning. He is able to learn not only from positive, but also from negative examples.
Books with bright, funny pictures and all sorts of “bad advice” will be a good help for him. They are often written in verse so that the rhythmic text is easier to remember.
Thus, the child learns from the example of others what not to do.
Such methods are used by teachers in kindergartens during classes to teach etiquette in a playful way. Along with normal conversation, this is an effective way to instill good manners.
Cartoons telling children what table etiquette is will also be useful for learning.